Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Boys to men.

So I’m a girl who is not, I suppose, actually a girl so much as a woman. I am, however, a kid at heart, loving to play and be silly. I’m a very active person, too. All of this lends to me generally dating men quite a bit younger than I am. Um, like 11 – 16 years younger. (Hey all you teens with incredibly oily skin, don’t you worry – it will pay off as you’ll always look younger than you are... even if it’s mostly because you still have zits at 40. I’m just saying...)

So this time it’s rather nice to be involved with someone who knows how to pay bills on his own, likes a clean space, gets references to 80’s movies, and doesn’t have homework to do before we can hang out! Okay, yes he’s still younger, but it’s a more reasonable range… and hopefully those few years means he can keep up with me!

I mentioned before that he lives quite a distance. I cannot begin to say how frustrating this is… yet making it more bearable is that, as actual adults, we have conversations which aren’t limited to a select few things since he doesn’t feel intimidated by my experience and knowledge. So all-in-all, I’m having a great time! Thanks, Toughguy*!

I did have a story about the last guy I saw regularly. Bookboy* and I have remained friends and go out for a movie and drinks now and then to catch up, so when Christmas came along he gave me a gift. It was a specially made pink, man’s T-shirt that reads, “I Craig Ferguson.” I sat there wanting to laugh-out-loud thinking, “Is he trying to tell me why we’re no longer dating?” A girl can love in many different ways – he needn’t be threatened! It’d make a good email to Craig, though...

In the end, it was a “good idea, bad idea” kind of thing. It was not very practical as I neither wear pale pink nor men’s wear (and he should have known this, really), though it was thoughtful because I am a huge Ferguson fan. Ferguson’s humor is exactly my speed and style. Bookboy is a Fallon fan. So, actually it does sum up why we’re not together. I am not young-and-hip, am looking for something more than just “cute,” and prefer humor that is off the cuff, clever, and sometimes rather naughty!

* Names have been changed to protect the not-at-all innocent.

(I must end this by saying that though Bookboy and his gift both come off sounding rather bad, he's a good guy and I do like the gift a lot... but what kind of story would this be without poking some fun??)


Lori said...

I've run into a similar situation. The last guy I dated was 2 years younger. My's complicated because we're more than friends but he's so far away we don't really know what it would mean to be in a relationship...guy is actually 4 years older than me. It's really amazing how those few years make a huge difference in male development!

Anyway, best of luck with your new guy. And appreciate your pink shirt for what it was--a recognition of a different style of humor by your ex.

whichwaydidshego said...

Yes, well with this new thing with Toughguy, whatever it might be or become, we talk FOR-E-VER on the phone. One call lasted - not exaggerating here - 12 hours. That's some good communication. Now if we could only get some... OTHER kinds of communication going!

And as to Bookboy, he used to WANT me to call him my boytoy. Think that defined the "relationship" part of things between us fairly well. (Like I said, still adore him AS A FRIEND.)

Lori said...

Sometimes I'll catch myself getting caught up on the details with him. We talk all day long by text. We have amazing communication and talk for hours if we get on the phone. He wakes me up with poems and tells me good night (unless he passes out from exhaustion). We love each other. I try to focus on that rather than the possibility of one of us ever moving halfway across the country so we can be together. It's hard but I wouldn't trade him.

whichwaydidshego said...

Wow, Lori - you have something really precious and special. Treasure it, for sure. I'm really happy for you. The poetry thing is pretty great, I have to say!